28 Days Later

The January Transfer Dealings of EPL Clubs in 2011

Common consent, and in fact common sense, recognises that it can be too early to review a Radiohead album; time is needed to assess whether it will be a grower, or if the name the ‘The King of Limbs’ will be more likely to be associated with Paulo Wanchope than with another of their all-time great albums. Similarly, after a transfer window in which English Premier League clubs spent over £215m, a January record, it is now perhaps time to look at how things have taken shape, a month after the window closed and the dust has settled.

And there are few places in football where more dust has settled than the Arsenal trophy cabinet in recent years, yet once again they failed to strengthen their squad. For the second successive window they were linked to string of goalkeepers, all of whom they have failed to capture; Mark Schwarzer was the closest to being signed last August until slipping out of Arsene Wenger’s grasp, like a ball in the hands of Almunia/Fabianski/Sczczesney (delete where applicable).

In contrast, Liverpool were particularly active with the movement of their first-team squad, trading players like a salesman who has fallen on hard times desperately swaps business cards in the last hours of the only networking event on the horizon until the end of May. Their hand was forced when Chelsea finally came in for Fernando Torres in the last third of the window, with the deal only being completed on deadline day. Chelsea apparently waited before going in for Torres because they didn’t want to spark a bidding war, in the unlikely event that anyone else would pay over £50m for someone who has looked like he has got out of the wrong side of bed everyday for over a year.

Torres’ prolonged slump has not just been evident in form and statistics, but is also visible simply by just watching him – a perfect example of this was Spain’s opening game in the World Cup, when within minutes of him being introduced it was clear to the trained eye he was not at the races. With the prospect of missing out on Champions League qualification next season Romam Abromovich has gambled on Torres recapturing his form of old, and it may yet happen, but the first 28 days has shown it can’t simply be magically turned back on with a change of shirt colour.

The biggest knock-on effect of the Torres signing was of course the going rate of Andy Carroll rising faster in value than the rare 12” vinyl copy of Day V Lately’s ‘Pulse & Thunder’ some DJ once bought on a record stall. With Carroll still injured, the thought that the offer was too good to refuse for Newcastle remains. Assuming they don’t get relegated (which they shouldn’t do after the solid start Chris Hughton gave them in a league where there are plenty of teams struggling), the Carroll transfer will be, like Torres, another good deal for the selling club.

Of the high value signings in the window, Edin Dzeco, David Luiz and Luis Suarez look to be the better players, while the price of Darren Bent didn’t seem as inflated as first thought after Chelsea and Liverpool got over excited on the last day. The best value of the lower fees could be Steven Pienaar to Spurs, while arguably the best business of all has been done either by clubs who have made astute loan signings, or those who have held on to players.

Aston Villa got Kyle Walker on loan for the rest of the season from Spurs, after he previously excelled at QPR, and another Spurs loan player, Jamie O’Hara, has already made an impact at Wolves. And as good a loan signing as any is Daniel Sturridge, who has scored in all the four league games he has played for Bolton since Chelsea let him go for the rest of the season to make way in their squad for Torres. Oh, the irony.

In contrast to Torres there is no doubting the confident state of Sturridge’s mind; in his opening press conference for Bolton he suggested that Drogba and Anelka were reaching the end of their careers, and he would be Torres’ striking partner with Chelsea next season. It could be that he may be better of staying within a stable and seemingly progressive set-up at Bolton instead, rather then back to the mad-house at Cobham.

Some players leaving the Premier League on loan are also showing signs of prospering, with Wayne Routledge having another good spell at QPR following a loan from Newcastle; Kyle Bartley is playing every week both domestically and in Europe for Glasgow Rangers, and Giovanni Dos Santos getting a fair run out at Racing Santander.

But Blackpool warding of offers for Charlie Adam, West Ham holding on to Scott Parker, and Everton keeping Phil Neville, may prove to be the best bit of business for Premier League clubs in the whole window.

Blackpool have a whole squad of players who now play the passing and moving game, but Adam is by far their best player and instrumental in their pattern of play. They were right to reject laughable offers from Aston Villa and Liverpool in particular. He nearly went to Spurs before the window shut, but keeping Adam is the best opportunity Blackpool have off staying up. Parker is even more vital to West Ham: he makes interceptions, tackles, has great passing ability, a good footballing brain (as demonstrated in his recent England appearance), and is now apparently even giving team talks.

West Ham brought in a few players as well as keeping Parker, signing Demba Ba, who has hit the ground running (having failed a medical at Stoke), and also getting in Robbie Keane on loan. Keane’s agent is someone who, despite the global economic problems of recent years, knows there is always work for him every transfer window. Keane may not have been the same player he was before he made the fateful decision to go to Liverpool, but after scoring on his debut for West Ham could well have made a positive difference to them if he had a run of games, which an injury has now prevented.

While Spurs shipped Keane out for the third time since 2008, they were after Phil Neville, but miscalculated Everton would let a valuable player go on the cheap just because of his age and the financial pressures they are under. Neville would have been a fantastic signing for Tottenham, a full-back who can defend properly on either side, is both footed, comfortable on the ball and also able to play the holding role in central midfield. He also has the ability to man-mark players, and the bottle to score decisive kicks in penalty shoot-outs – attributes that could be particularly useful in the knock out stages of the Champions League. And of course, like Parker, Neville is a leader.

In fact the lack of activity at Tottenham was particularly unusual. After the flurry of activity at Tottenham’s training ground at the start of the window, when David Beckham came to train, there was little until the penultimate evening, when it emerged there were multi-million bids going in for most top strikers in Spain that weren’t cup-tied in the Champions League. The offers were in-keeping with the ambition of the club, but hard to complete in January; as long as Tottenham are in the Champions League again next season, it should be easier to do business in the summer.

There is little doubt that the perceived benefit of having a window – so clubs could work with squad they have, and not making signings throughout the season as fluctuations of form and pressures from fans dictate – is being outweighed by the negative consequences of over-inflated prices, where the power of the agent is further increased.

The window is perhaps more valued by Sky Sports News (SSN) than clubs, with their first ticking clock starting sometime around the Christmas period waiting for the window to open. There was no “two phones” Andy Burton at the death this time, suspended for his unwitting part in the downfall of Andy Gray, for which he deserves a medal rather than castigation. There was still plenty going on in the final evening this year without him though, but throughout January SSN insisted on wasting the ability of good journalists, forcing them to play with a massive Sky touch screen, when, as Dhamarsh Seth showed with his persistent and intelligent questioning on Ashley Cole to the clear discomfort of Carlo Ancoletti at today’s Chelsea press conference, their skills lie elsewhere.

As well as Sky Sport News and football agents, the other beneficiary of the transfer window can be players, but usually at the expense of their existing club. The biggest transfer of the January window would have been Wayne Rooney going across Manchester from United to City, but despite having thought about it enough to affect his form since his return from injury last season, Rooney’s supposed disenchantment with United’s lack of investment in the squad was finally dispelled by men in balaclavas coupled with United investing a few extra grand a week in his pay packet instead.

However spectacular Rooney’s winning goal was against City earlier this month, it is unlikely to top the significance of Birmingham’s loan signing Obafemi Martins, who yesterday scored that goal that put Birmingham City into Europe, winning their first trophy since 1963 and at the same time making a lot of people who wanted Arsenal to lose very, very happy. And for that, he is the signing of the January Transfer window so far.

No Surprises

A couple of seasons ago, when the first Sky Sports ‘Super Sunday’ of the season began, introducing Dion Dublin to the football commentary team, the start of the programme was clearly an interruption to a jovial off-air discussion. As Richard Keys welcomed Dublin to viewers, Dublin joked about the fun it sounded he was going to have from what he had just heard, as Keys, laughing, told him to “ssshhh, not on air”; Jamie Redknapp meanwhile pointed out there were some “good players” in the studio, while Andy Gray continued laughing. If that episode brought to mind the scene in The Office with Jennifer's realisation about Wernham Hogg that “…this is just one big boys club…” that was surpassed yesterday.

On a day when the recording of Keys and Gray’s off-air pitchside conversation at Wolves the previous day was released into the public domain, with views Kick It Out reasonably called “medieval in tone”, Keys opened ‘Super Sunday’, looking straight into the camera, with the one-word sentence, “Unsackable.” This was a supposed tenuous reference to Steve Keen, and Keys then led into a montage about Blackburn. When that finished, Keys introduced his guests, laughing along with him. The guests were Sam Alladyce (notorious for his belief that women know nothing about sport, as well documented by Marina Hyde, and brilliantly parodied by the tweeter @thebig_sam), and Ian Holloway (who as well as doing an excellent job at Blackpool, is a popular raconteur in the game whose arguably most famous allergy is about “pulling an ugly bird”).

It wasn’t much of a Super Sunday for live domestic football on Sky Sports all-in-all, with Marlon King scoring the opening goal in the first game of the day for Coventry against QPR; the misogyny displayed by Keys and Gray perhaps a glimpse into the darkness on the edge of football, that allowed King so seamlessly back into football after his very real crimes against women.

Casual Sexism has appeared elsewhere in recent times in television coverage of football: it is hard to imagine Paul Jewell speaking to any man like he spoke to Claire Tomlinson in her short-time presenting ‘Goals on Sunday’, although it is possible gender may not have been a factor in the less than gracious way Sir Alex Ferguson dealt with a post-match interview with Rebecca Lowe on ESPN last-season.

The face of the Sky Sports Football team is in sharp contrast to the excellent Sky Sports News channel, where there are many excellent women sports journalists at the fore, including the presenter Charlie Webster, who is currently undertaking an FA Level 2 Coaching Badge, and plans to work with the FA to encourage more female participation.

As several tweeters pointed out at yesterday, it is hardly a surprise that Keys and Gray have ignorant, out-dated views – they have been calling Liverpool a top four club for the best part of the season; in fact they have had so much airtime over the years, we all know how bad their judgement is. But is hard to believe they have never had any intelligent conversations about football with women, and more likely instead to assume they just don’t listen.

Twitter has also shown in the wake of the recording, that I am one of many men who want to make it clear, they don’t speak for us.

The belligerence shown by Keys yesterday is a reminder why an apology is not a strong enough sanction. The fact the comments were not intended for air are not an excuse, as that conversation is a window in the heart of darkness of two Sky Sports employees who give their personal opinions on the game to the football nation every week.

It may make ‘The Last Word’ interesting viewing for a change tonight, which is unfortunately scheduled against the most enjoyable football programme on Television at the moment  - ESPN’s ‘Talk of the Terrace’.

‘Talk of the Terrace’s main presenter is Kelly Cates, a former Sky Sports News Presenter, and of course daughter of Kenny Dalglish, who reportedly began his press conference this morning by asking the Sky Sports reporter if he minded having a women journalist in the room.

If there is a direct apology from Keys and Gray tonight, I fear the last word may be ‘”luv.”

Halfway between the Gutter and the Season ending in ‘1’

In the lead up to Christmas, Sky Sports showed their ‘Premiership Years’ series on a daily basis, a welcome late-night alternative to the rolling news of cars not being able to start in the snow for body-clocks like mine, still on Ashes time, but with the Third Test over all too quickly.

Each episode of the Premiership Years (a self-contained review of each of the league seasons from when Sky pretends football began) is stretched out over two-hours not just so Sky can run lots of trailers with their awful Christmas music during the commercial breaks, but because, as well as football highlights, the programmes show how Sky Sports introduced and covered certain live matches at the time, as well as events of the day.

So, of course hindsight is important in the final compilation; and, as we are now at the halfway point of the Premiership Season, and coming towards the end of the festive period, it is an interesting time to look ahead to how a ‘Premiership Years 2010-11’ programme might look in the future, and reflect on the season so far. (It is also traditional - as Bart Simpson once said in one of the many Simpsons Christmas Special, people have been recycling Charles Dickens’s Christmas Carol idea for years).

A significant footballing event that won’t be ignored in any future Sky Sports retrospective of the season will be the award of the World Cups to Russia and Qatar respectively, the first at the expense of England. And perhaps they could play that footage to Pink Floyd’s ‘Money’, as they go on to note that as 2011 starts, Sepp Blatter announces he is setting-up an anti-corruption unit, which is likely to be as effective as the self-regulation of banking by the FSA, as the guttersnipe smell of corruption lingers around FIFA like murder follows Miss Marple.

There is no doubt of the footballing highlight so far this season, Barcalona’s mastercalss against Real Madrid. The Premiership Years does mention the odd non-Premier League event, and this would surely get a mention, even though it is unlikely that Andy Gray’s recent suggestion - that Lionel Messi isn’t totally proven because he hasn’t done it at Stoke away - will make a compilation in which every effort is made to seem their analysts wise. (And with analysts like Gray, Graeme Souness and Jamie Redknapp, that is some effort).

A constant of all the highlights programmes are the seasons managerial comings and goings; it won’t be just be hindsight that will make both footage of Hollieur’s opening press conference at Aston Villa and Chris Hughton pulling out of the Newcastle car park after his disgraceful treatment, look like bizarre board decisions in years to come.

Also no doubt the turmoil of Liverpool will be heavily featured, with the protracted sale of the club, and their poor playing form continued over from last season. And with Rafa Benetiz in his “holiday home” in the Wirral, the best (or worst for Liverpool fans), may be yet to come.

This season has had one other moment when one of Benetiz’s other strange judgement calls, aside from his choice of vacation in the coldest December on record, was highlighted: at the same time as Xavi Alonso was at the centre of a fluid Spanish team at Hampden Park in November, Gareth Barry (the man Benetiz tried to bring to Liverpool while attempting to sell Alonso) was resembling a fish out of water at Wembley Stadium as England were being outplayed by a French side who just months earlier looked like The Joke Team of International Football.

Benetiz’s reputation as a Manager is now proving to be one of the mysteries of the contemporary times, like the location of Richey Edwards, and the popularity of Chris Evans. It is ironic some Liverpool fans are singing his name while calling for Hodgson’s head, and after Mike Ashley’s appointment of Kevin Keegan a couple of seasons ago, they could rue what they ask for from new owners.

New owners who do seem to have already made a statement of intent about the footballing vision they want, are those at Blackburn. While a subsequent highlights package will no doubt focus on poultry, and Graham Taylor’s chicken boycott, the fact that they said they let go of Sam Alladyce because they didn’t like his style of football is refreshing.

It was leaked at the time that there were disagreements over transfer targets, and with Blackburn now being linked with Ronaldinhio there could be truth in that; while Ronaldinhio was the central playmaker when Brazil won the World Cup in 2002, was named World Player of the Year in 2005 and 2006, and looked in good form in the Champions League for Milan this season, Big Sam may have had doubts about how he performs on prozone. His goal against England in 2002 was from outside of the box, and shooting from outside the area was something Alladyce used to fine his players at Bolton for. And, as Big Sam’s mate Andy Gray might point out, Ronaldinihio may be okay pissing all over at Real Madrid away in El Classico, but he is unproven at Stoke on a cold night.

Meanwhile, there is no doubt who has been the signing of the season so far, Rafa Van Der Vaart. A bargain in today’s market at £8m, in the 16 games he played for Spurs in the Premier League and European Cup since making his debut in September until his last game of the calendar year, he has scored 10 goals and had 6 assists. He is a leader on the field, and has a deftness of touch exemplified in his assist to Gareth Bale for Tottenham’s first goal in the away win at the Emirates, and his lay-off, again to Bale, in the sparkling move that led to his own second goal away at Aston Villa on Boxing, which proved to be the winner.

And it is Bale himself, who has been the Premier League player of the season so far, and in fact the PL player of the whole calendar year, since finally being given a chance against Peterborough in the FA Cup one year ago this week. That day he was at left-back, which looked like his natural position, and he ran the game, and got two assists. Playing from left-wing all this season, where he finished last season in fine form, he also scored ten goals in all competitions up until the end of the year, with key assists in big games, and some stunning individual performances, particularly at the San Siro, where he scored three excellent goals, that were a pleasure to witness.

And as Tottenham continue to push on at home and in Europe we can be sure that one thing that won’t make the Sky Sports Season review is Andy Gray’s analysis of the Champions League draw, when he predicted all the clubs from the home nations, including Glasgow Rangers, would qualify, apart from Spurs. Not that he is the only football pundit that is continually dismissive of Spurs, but thankfully as this is a Sky Sports package, there will be no Lawrenson and Hansen.

Below is my Team of Premier League players, based on the first –half of the season, and so unbiased it includes a gooner. The team will probably differ from what Andy Gray himself may pick now – it doesn’t have Steven Gerrard, Frank Lampard or John Terry in, which seems to be compulsory. And Gray may now also pick Chris Baird, following his two excellent goals over the Christmas period, because they came away at Stoke, and as Gray has told us, that is the real litmus test.

Premier League XI of the first-half of the season 2010-2011:

(4-4-1-1)

Joe Hart; Nedum Onuoha, Vincent Kompany, Nemanja Vidic, Leighton Baines; Nasri, Scott Parker, Luka Modric, Gareth Bale; Rafa Van Der Vaart; Andy Carroll.

Subs: Paul Robinson, Scott Dann, Phil Neville, Charlie Adam, Tim Cahill, Carlos Tevez, Dimitar Berbatov.